August 17, 2012
Are we ever really ready, or are we destined to always feel we are running onto the stage adjusting our costumes. I am doing a 1-day bus trip to NYC tomorrow for the only rehearsal I will have with my pianist before our recording session and concert at the end of September. So I check and double-check my packing list: bus snacks, music-player and headphones, water, sheet music, instrument, umbrella, sweater… Luiz is so much more than a pianist for me, he is also a litmus test of how well I am doing with my compositions. A Brazilian, a composer, a performer, he breathes life into my music. I rely on his comments, the slight frown that crosses his face when something isn’t right, his brilliant smile when we have got to the best place for creating that elusive synthesis of instruments and ideas. I have been doubting my hybrid-choro concept even as I have followed my self-made assignment of writing 6 new pieces in a Brazilian style based on 6 earlier pieces of classical music or jazz. Why? Who knows where ideas come from. But for me, when one arrests me with its delicious possibilities I become irrevocably hooked. These piece have come from me and made it through their first test in Rio of M’s adjustment of harmony, holding his interest. I’ve played two with Bob, my local guitar partner, more with C & J, guitar and bass in MN, and they have all been intrigued. But tomorrow I will pull them out, all 6, and one by one play through them with Luiz, and together we’ll come up with the format for the recording, the way the world will remember them. With every outing I have become more convinced my concept has merit. But tomorrow will be crucial. I hardly sleep all night.